To Edify Or Not… Being Online
Online activity has been a part of our family and home school for the past five years. At times it has been a blessing and at others, a curse. It is one of many activities in our lives that can be edifying or not. When used improperly, activities that would normally be edifying to our lives can become time-consuming, wasteful, and sinful activities. When we allow anything to overshadow what Yahveh has for our lives, to grow us in him and his truths, it is in opposition to him and is no longer edifying to us or those around us.
“Being online” is one of those activities. Our online lives can encompass many things. It can be being a part of social networking, blogging, forums and boards, all which are their own little communities. It can be just a time to write down our thoughts and daily activities, sharing thoughts with friends, or a place to write our home school projects out on. Maybe you are someone who has a home business or ministry, or maybe you just keep in contact with family far away. Maybe you dislike spending time with your family, so you spend time online with your friends and play games to escape the reality of your life. For different people, being online affects their lives differently.
I have been on both sides of the online fence. I have spent time encouraging and ministering, writing and working on things like for Gleaning the Harvest families, and I have also spent late nights playing games, having a little ‘me’ time or chatting for hours until way into the morning. While the former is an edifying way to spend time online, the latter is not. That is not to say that all that is ’good’ of an activity means it is best. I have found that the best measure of whether I am taking too many liberties with my time online is my children and husband. They truly do know if I am online too much. If they are clamoring for attention, I am off-kilter and neglectful in my priorities. For young adults, your parents do know if you are online too much. Your parents are your protection from becoming off-kilter and neglectful when you can’t see it for yourself. Online life should never interfere with the relationships and the duties in real life that Yahveh gives his people.
I should never have a better relationship with an online friend than I do with my (parents), husband and children, (siblings). I am the first to tell you that my friends online are my real friends. People I have never met can be real friends. In the same token, most of them would be the first to tell you that if I am off in my relationship with Yahveh and my relationships in my home, then I have no business cultivating a relationship with them. Yahveh first, then his plan for my life: my marriage, my children, my home.
When I decided to allow our children to get their own blogs and subsequently, their own online personas and their own little niches on the web, I did so with trepidation. I didn’t just say, “Hey, sure, have at it.” As a parent, I know there is a responsibility that comes with such things. I know that any relationship and any place a child can go outside of the ‘view’ of their parents can become a danger to them. I was not about to allow that to happen. We set up rules and parameters of blogging and online time and where they could be and with whom they could associate.
Young ladies, there is a danger in being online and not having someone know you online who will keep you responsible. No matter your age, the enemy of your souls will tempt you and keep trying to make you fall. Of course there is no way to be perfect, but we are to at least strive to be perfect as he is perfect, so having an accountability partner is a must in most areas of our lives. We know our own weaknesses, and if this is a weakness of yours, let someone know who will hold you responsible.
When it comes to online relationships, even as a home school mom, I can let my time and relationships online go too far. I can allow others’ ideals and beliefs come into my mind and my family and if I am not careful, it can affect my real life, as easily as any bad real-life influence can. I am thankful I recognized this could be a danger for my young ladies.,. At these impressionable and vulnerable ages, it is my job as Momma to encourage and guide them in their experiences online, just as it is in real life. Young ladies, it is very good to have Mom included in your friendships, what you write and any social networking sites you belong to online or in real life for this very reason: Yahveh gave you your Momma and your sisters to be best friends with and to love you and encourage you in Scriptures, and likewise, you are to do the same for your sisters.
There are so many things we can, as young ladies and as adult women, get tangled up in online. There are many good things to be involved in online. There are also just as many seemingly good activities that will take our hearts and our thoughts away from our family and our responsibilities and put the focus on our online lives – on our SELVES, ahead of the precious in-real life he has given us to care for and love and the mission he has for us to fulfill offline.
So, just what can I do to protect my online time and relationships? The first thing is to always be open to the leading of Yahveh in your spirit. If you feel like you should not be or should be doing something, then pay attention.
As with all things, it is good to have a plan. Make a list of written rules. That might seem silly to have to have one written out, but it is proven that things that we write out seem more important to us – and we remember them! Of course, we all have different triggers and weaknesses, so my list won’t look like yours does.
Here is a list of some things we might include:
1. Spend time with Yahveh before getting on the computer. Pray and ask him about relationships and your time, on- and off-line.
2. Pay attention to conviction.
3. Know your own shortcomings and be diligent to not give them a chance to dominate you.
4. Set a timer if you have an issue with time management.
5. Do not chat with someone privately.
6. Do not be friends with someone none of your friends or family are friends with
7. Do not allow online time and activities to set priority or schedules in your home.
8. When you are done, get off the computer. Do not surf the net; you will surely find something to do – something unnecessary.
I know from experience that you have likely also had to deal with some of these issues. Tell me some of the things you do to keep your online time edifying and on-track, not becoming a time-waster or sin you will fall into?







To start off the day right, I have my homepage set to My blog (currently). This reminds me to stay focused. Do what needs to be done and then get on with my day.
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This is something that I still struggle with, especially with using online resources for homeschooling. It is so easy to get “lost” jumping from one page to another.
One thing I am doing to try and use my time wisely, is to set up a daily schedule, where I actually schedule the time I am to be online. I allow myself to deviate for about 10 minutes past the end of my “time”, but not more than that. If I need to, I put a post it on the computer to remind me where I left off, and leave the window open, and just shut the laptop. It will be there when I am able to go back online.
I am still working on getting the boys online to do blogs. I am going over your rules that you posted awhile ago, and modifying for our family.
Like I said, I still have a long way to go :)
Be blessed, and thank you for a wonderful post.
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